Action Brings Good Fortune

Photo by cybaea .  licensed under
Creative Commons Attribution 2.0 Generic.

Today is one of those days where writing feels like a labor instead of a liberating trip into the exalted sky of the mind.  You may be wondering why I am bothering to write then?  A fair question.  I'm writing because I am hoping that by doing so I may again discover that spark that will lead to inspiration.  There is a passage in the I-Ching that was quoted by Syd Barrett in a Pink Floyd song, and has stuck with me over the years: "action brings good fortune".  I've found this to be true in my life, so here I am listening to some secret, magical music and writing my way in search of The Muse like a desperate man stumbling through a hedge maze.

I try to take a zen approach to my writing.  And I really can't complain about feeling uninspired because I had a very fruitful writing week last week.  My unconscious must have been digging for story ideas, because by this past Friday I was creatively spent.  I haven't hit a creative nadir like this in quite some time.  I guess the lows come with the highs...  In response I've just hunkered down and tried to have faith that the feeling will pass.  I do find it disconcerting to feel so powerless.  I sometimes find myself wondering whether there's a chance that inspiration may have passed me by for good.  But it always seems to come back.  I feel it's important to respect and cherish the magic in the creative process.  I think taking things for granted is one of the biggest risks in life, and maybe a core source of writer's block.  Historian Arnold Toynbee once said: "nothing fails like success".  So I always entertain my doubts--I never try to squelch them.  It means that I'm never truly comfortable, but I think it also prevents me from falling into habits that could lead to unfortunate outcomes.

Life is often like a hedge maze.  I like to think that, if we're wise, we sometimes find ladders to look over the walls, and help ourselves to determine the right choices.  But sometimes--inevitably--we are forced into choices that are less informed.  Life comes at us like a wild-eyed, axe-wielding Jack Nicholson, and we don't have the luxury of long, measured decisions.  Again, "action brings good fortune".  Brain locking into analysis paralysis at these moments is usually far worse than a quick decision.  The Jack Nicholson in my life is usually my day job, which often causes me to dash and stumble through my writing life.  But Jack is a necessary and positive component of my existence, despite his demonstrable insanity.

I'm getting fairly close to being able to start writing Hemlock Book III now.  That's actually a fairly amazing statement since my intention has been to take several months off before starting to write.  But completing Book II hasn't left me with the same feeling of satisfaction as completing Book I did.  Book II has a bit of an "Empire Strikes Back" syndrome going on.  The events of Book III are pulling me forward like a tractor beam.  I just have to write them as soon as possible!  Like the early onset of spring here on the east coast of the United States, it seems that I'm in the process of an early resumption of earnest novel writing.

Well, this blog post is almost over now.  And I think it had a purpose after all.  I certainly feel better for having written it.  Thank you for reading it!

Go Big or Go Home

 I've started working on Hemlock Book III.  So far it's been equal parts intimidating and reassuring.  On one hand, I know what to expect in terms of process.  I'll be reusing the process I used with Book II.  And this time I'm closer to the end of the story arc that I have planned for the series, so there is less uncertainty about plot and structure.

But Book III is probably going to be the final volume in the series... My magnum opus, if you will.  That aspiration carries some baggage with it.  And some of the things that will happen in this installment...  Well, I guess it won't surprise you that they will be epic (it IS Book III, after all).  But this book is going to be unconventional.  I'd even go so far as to say it's going to be experimental.  But I don't mean experimental in the sense that I'm unsure of the outcome.  I have the utmost confidence it will be the final part of the series that  I set out to write.  I use the word experimental to express the level of deviation it will represent from the structure of other fantasy books I've read.

As the snowboarders like to say: "Go big or go home."

I think this is the cool thing about being an Indie.  If I had a publishing deal and approached an editor with this concept, I have a feeling I'd be gently forced to do something safer.  It's nice to be able to get my unfiltered vision out there, and have an opportunity for it to reach readers directly.

Initial reviews of Book II have been very positive, and that feels great.  I'm having a harder time marketing this time around though.  My energy level for social networking and other marketing has been low, lately.  I remember slipping into the marketing role much more effectively after Book I was completed.  I'm not sure what is different this time around, but since I seem to be more energized to write than to market, I'm going to "go with the flow".  Maybe I'll need a break from writing at some point, and the marketing hat will re-materialize on my head.  For now, it's full-on "imagineering".

One final note: I recently posted a free short story called "The Gene Priest" here on the site.  Check it out if you haven't noticed it.  It's linked from the menu bar.

Knight Vision

Photo by Diveofficer .  licensed under
Creative Commons Attribution 2.0 Generic.

I've continued to indulge my Bigfoot fetish over the past few weeks.  I watch a television show called "Finding Bigfoot", and I always enjoy it.  Despite being skeptical that Bigfoot are real, I enjoy the possibility that they could be real; and watching these people who seem to genuinely believe they're real makes it easier for me to suspend disbelief.  Plus, I enjoy the vicarious experience of the wilderness expeditions, and the thermal images and use of night vision give the whole enterprise a distinctly sci-fi feel.

Watching these Bigfoot researchers also has another effect on me.  As I consider their work and watch their endeavors, it gives me a hint of the potentially illusory nature of my own life and perceptions.  If these educated people can devote their lives to the pursuit of something that is not supported by any irrefutable, empirical evidence, then certainly some of my own anxieties could be similarly misguided.  If held to the same loose standard as Bigfoot evidence, maybe the cold, hard aspects of our reality could be seen as comfortingly fictitious.  Perhaps I don't need to go to work every morning, pay my bills, do my taxes and go grocery shopping.  Maybe the widespread discord I read about in the news isn't real.  Maybe some day Bigfoot will pull up in an El Camino and beckon to me with a hirsute arm extending out from a chrome-bordered window.  The El Camino will be a UFO (of course), and we'll fly up to Venus and meet the Venutians.  They will inform me that all of my daily responsibilities and concerns are meaningless, and tell me I should just write 24x7.

All kidding aside, sometimes it's comforting to perceive your life as an illusion.  It can all get so intense.  The Buddhists say that life is an illusion, but they don't mean that it's meaningless.  On the contrary, being born as a human is supposed to represent the result of a series of spiritual evolutions.  And the purpose of this grand illusion that we call life is supposed to be our continuing spiritual evolution.

But some people perceive the insanity of life, and they decide that nothing matters.  I think many people--especially the more intelligent among us--are secretly existential nihilists.  That's one thing you have to give the Bigfoot researchers credit for: they are passionate about their quest.  Whether they are figurative Percivals or Don Quixotes is open to debate.  I suppose there's also the possibility they are figurative Rasputins.  But I'm inclined to give them the benefit of the doubt.

So, when I'm watching the Bigfoot show, I feel an almost serene detachment from reality.  And maybe the thing that I like about the show is that these people are believing in an illusion, and then trying to prove it's real.  I'm doing the opposite in my life:  I'm accepting that empirical reality is "real", but at the same time I'm desperately trying to prove it's an illusion.  Or, to put it another way, I'm trying to experience that there is a duality intrinsic to empirical reality that cannot be measured or quantified.

It's clear that weird stuff happens in quantum physics.  There's that experiment with quantum entaglement where the act of perceiving a particle is the only thing that gives it a determinate charge (to anyone who knows physics, I apologize for this clumsy explanation).  So, at the quantum physical level, perception does literally equal reality.

And I found this quote in a United States Central Intelligence Agency study:  "People tend to think of perception as a passive process. We see, hear, smell, taste or feel stimuli that impinge upon our senses. We think that if we are at all objective, we record what is actually there. Yet perception is demonstrably an active rather than a passive process; it constructs rather than records "reality." Perception implies understanding as well as awareness. It is a process of inference in which people construct their own version of reality on the basis of information provided through the five senses."

I think this passage explains the mentality of the Bigfoot researcher quite well.  Every falling branch becomes a Bigfoot "wood knock".  Every unusual howl in the night becomes a sasquatch call.  But who am I to question them for that when I try to interpret every bad thing that happens in my life as part of a spiritual journey?  In a way, I don't think that much differently than they do.  And maybe that's why I feel like I'm among friends when I watch their show.

Hemlock and the Dead God's Legacy Released!

The sequel to Hemlock and the Wizard Tower has been released!  Amazon Link. It is priced at $0.99 for one week in appreciation of those who have been waiting for it and giving me encouragement during the process of developing it. It will rise to $2.99 around 4/1/12. I can sure use some reviews and/or "Likes" if anyone is so inclined!


Hemlock and the Dead God's Legacy

Hemlock realizes that the life of a leader is more complex and tiresome than she anticipated. Feeling burdened by her many responsibilities, she yearns for the freedom of adventure. When Tored arrives from the Witch Crags with information about the likely location of another powerful Wand, she seizes the opportunity to embark on a new quest.
Before she leaves, she entrusts a secret book into the possession of Merit, a mechanical gnome who is developing an affinity for history and lore. Merit begins to uncover an ancient narrative in those dusty pages--and he soon realizes it's the tale of the creation of the Wizard Tower itself!
Meanwhile Hemlock and Tored begin what they expect will be a simple quest to a mysterious vale nestled deep in the Witch Crags. But the adventure has several surprises in store for them...
Will Hemlock understand her ever evolving role amidst rapidly changing circumstances? And can she unite the City in time to resist the menace of the legacy of a dead God?

Towers

I'm writing this blog post from inside the Wizard Tower.  It's an imaginary place, of course--a place where I might see a wizard stroll by; or hear the call of an exotic animal echoing through the halls, as it is the subject of some bizarre, magical experiment.

So, as I sit here imagining myself in a tower, how do I feel?  Empowered? Protected?  Isolated?  I look out over the teeming City and the sense of height is palpable.  Here the concept of governance leaves the realm of the abstract as I watch the people going about their daily activities like ants in a hive crossection.

I'm fascinated by towers.  And Hemlock and the Wizard Tower is a novel about toppling towers.  In the figurative sense, it's about perceiving the people who occupy elevated positions of power, determining that they are hostile or even evil, and then destroying the source of their power.

I got to thinking about the upcoming sequel to Hemlock and the Wizard Tower in terms of this theme, and my conclusion is that this new book (Hemlock and the Dead God's Legacy) is actually about building towers.  Because in a revolution it's not enough to simply want to change something.  There has to be a vision of what to replace it with.  And that's often much more difficult than the act of destruction.  At the end of a revolution the proverbial slate has been wiped clean, and a new regime has been handed the chalk.  What will they do with it?  This is one of the ideas explored in Hemlock and the Dead God's Legacy.

Another theme is...well...Gods themselves.  I received a tweet from a pastor this week which contained a gentle rebuke for the title of the new novel.  He wrote, "gods may die but God never does."  I didn't respond because I didn't see a point--I don't see Twitter as an ideal platform for an idealogical debate.  And the intersection of religion and fantasy has been examined and documented in great detail.  If he doesn't understand or appreciate that, then I doubt my 120 character response will change his point of view.  I will say this about my novels:  they are not explicitly religious, but they are explicitly spiritual.  The characters in my stories care deeply about their lives and their world.  Many of them have strong feelings of responsibility and altruism.  Some are more Machiavellian than others, but none of them would see themselves as being like that to a fault.

I'd say my novels are intended to be like a black and tan beer insofar as the lighter action fare is meant to accompany and complement the headier aspects of the story.  I never want to beat people over the head with the themes in my stories.  In fact, I'm not sure most readers even notice the underlying themes.  And that's fine.  My primary goal has always been (and will continue to be) to entertain.



Hemlock and the Dead God's Legacy is about midway through the editing process.  I am still shooting for a 4/1 release.

Free Falling (or Falling in Love with Free)

Photo by Kheel Center, Cornell University.  licensed under
Creative Commons Attribution 2.0 Generic.

I did my first Amazon.com free book promotion over the weekend through their KDP Select program.  I have to say as a sort of weak disclaimer that I dislike the monopolistic flavor of the Select program, but I felt I had to try it.  It seems to me that free is the new $0.99 in the world of indie publishing (I'm glad there isn't a way for indie authors to pay readers to read their books, because I'm certain that would be the next logical step in the struggle to get out of the "slushpile" of indie obscurity--but I digress).  Amazon's KDP Select program is the only way to go free on their site without violating their contractual terms.  I know many authors use the price match function to go free, but I don't like having to violate the contract in order to achieve freebie status.  So I stuck to the straight and narrow.

Despite my ideological reservations, I have to say I am thrilled with the results of the promotion.  Hemlock and the Wizard Tower reached #2 in free Epic fantasy on Saturday, and spent a good deal of Sunday at #1.  It spent about half of Sunday in the top 100 free titles list, which I hear is a "big deal" in terms of the mystical inner workings of the Amazon ranking algorithms.  I don't really understand those intricacies yet, but it sounds good.  And so far this week my paid sales are actually coming in drizzles and spurts (as opposed to their former trickle).

But a surprising feeling hit me in the waning hours of Sunday as I gleefully watched the free downloads accumulate.  Since then I have been wondering about all of these people who now have my book, and may soon be reading it.  It was easy for me to create an imaginary connection with the trickle of readers I had been reaching before the promotion.  I would imagine a guy reading in Arizona or a woman reading in Liverpool, and that would feel OK--be manageable in some hypothetical way.  But this torrent of simultaneous downloads is different.  Now I am dealing with an auditorium full of imaginary downloaders--a number that my imagination just can't quite come to grips with.  I've ended up visualizing a mass of readers in a big room: but they are faceless--rendered anonymous in aggregate--sort of like the replicating Agent Smiths from the Matrix II movie.  And I'm not sure how I relate to them exactly in this imaginary space.  They are reading something very dear to me, but I am conspicuously absent from the scene.  Or maybe I've been fragmented into a multitude of tiny pieces that flew out into cyberspace with each ebook.

Now, I realize this is a silly way to think.  But remember: I'm a person who sometimes uses my imagination to frame and interpret reality.  So, as a result of this promotion, I have had to come to terms with this sudden expansion of readership; and in the process I've had to let go of the imaginary feeling of connection I'd grown used to.  But, like we used to say when I was part of a company that faced problems related to growth, this is a good problem to have!

A note to potential readers: I'm sorry if you missed the free promotion.  It may happen again, but I can't say for sure.  Rest assured that Hemlock and the Wizard Tower is regularly priced at the lowest possible price Amazon allows: $0.99.

Cover of Hemlock and the Dead God's Legacy!

 Here is the work in progress cover art for Hemlock and the Dead God's Legacy!  I'm super excited to unveil it!  We're still reviewing it, but it's very,very close.

I'm still working through the revisions of the ending of the new novel.  All I can say is: "God bless President's Day!"  In a stroke of good fortune I've been granted a precious day off on Monday that I'll be able to use to write uninterrupted!  What timing!

So I'm rushing around like a busy little wizard adding new ending scenes, tweaking things and generally cleaning up the chaotic mess that ending "1.0" was.  I was telling some friends that if I ever try to release any of my writing with a "1.0" version of an ending again, they should physically slap me in the face, and possibly curb stomp me.  OK, maybe the curb stomping would put my ability to revise the ending at risk, so scratch that.  Maybe instead of a plain slap, it could be a gentleman's slap with a leather glove (or something equally dramatic and injury-free) instead.  That would get my attention!

I don't have anything else to share right now.  I'm busy writing and imagineering, and there's not much more to say than that.  I think the release of the new novel is mere weeks away at this point!